Threesome Q&A: My friend invited me to have a threesome with her and her husband

Q: Recently, I got an invitation from my friend Lily and her husband when I went to their house for dinner. I was talking about my experience of having 3some dating with a swinger couple I met on a swingers app when they suddenly brought up the proposal. At first, I thought they were just joking. After seeing them really talking about it, I knew they were serious. I said I’m not sure if it’s a great idea. I never really thought of having threesome with my friends before and never did I. I will only have threesome hookup with strangers I met in bars, clubs or sometimes tinder for threesome app. Friends just not an option for me, because it is risky, but not because it is not good. I know having 3some dating with friends can be a much better experience since we have connection and we trust each other, but I always think it is not worth the risk. But when they really brought it up, it made me thinking. What if we are fine after the threesome? What if we become even closer? Honestly speaking, I do want to try threesome with someone I know and there has been no one for me until now. I know very well that I want to try it and agree to their proposal, but I just have some concerns. Is there anyone who ever had 3some dating with their friends? I really could use some advice.

A: As an experienced swinger couple with my husband, I am telling you that you can do that as long as you set some boundaries with your friends.

I had been there once. One of my friends told me that she wanted to have a tinder for couples with me and my husband. I felt awkward even when she told me this. I was a major anti-fwb person. I don’t believe there is friendship between two persons who slept with each other, same for three persons or more. So when she brought up the proposal, I declined it without thinking. I just took it as a joke.

At night in the bed with my husband, he mentioned it again and we really talked about it. We realized it actually was not a bad idea. Having 3some dating with friends is surely risky, but it can be also much more comfortable and pleasing. After thinking about it for days, my husband and I invited my friend over for a threesome. But before threesome, we came up with some rules. First, we would trust each other completely. That means I will trust her that she won’t steal my husband away from me. Second, No romantic emotions allowed between us, only friendship. Third, our friendship will remain the same once we are tired of each other sexually.

The threesome turned out to be a success. Now, we would occasionally have threesome, but we all know that friendship comes first.